Miscarriage

A couple months ago Sarah and I found out that she was pregnant with our second child. We had been trying for a few months and were really excited. We told some family and a few friends but decided to try to keep it mostly under wraps for a couple more months.

Over the next several weeks, due to some medical test results and other signs, the conclusion was reached that we were most likely losing or going to lose the baby. We started to grieve, we named the child, and we sought comfort. But we still had an appointment at 7 weeks to check for a heartbeat. On the ride to the doctor's office we talked about what we would do if the baby beat the odds. We tried not to get excited, to push down the hope we thought would only disappoint us. As the technician started the ultrasound I didn't want to look at the screen. Then she said "There's the heartbeat, see?" My heart leaped and I looked over at Sarah, who was trying to hold back her response. The last month turned upside down, and I felt ecstatic as the technician printed an ultrasound capture showing our tiny little baby in the yolk sac. After the talking to the doctor we set up another appointment for the next month. On the way home we thanked God and called the people we had told about the possible miscarriage to let them know that the baby was all right.

Sarah went to the next appointment, which was about two weeks ago on a Thursday, by herself. We knew that the pregnancy was still high risk, but things didn't seem to have changed too much from the last appointment. There were still some signs that could have been bad but are also common for healthy pregnancies, and Sarah still had morning sickness.

After the appointment Sarah called me and told me that we had lost our baby.

In some ways we're at peace. We know the child is with his true Father. We know that we're not alone. Three young couples that we know have lost babies to miscarriages within the last year, and uncles and aunts and friends have let us know that they've been here too. It's been hard but we're grateful for the hope that we have in Christ. Pray that God would bless us with time to talk and to mourn together.